Putting the Junk in Junk Store

A geezer in Louisiana who thought the managers of a local bookstore had given him the shaft decided to return the favor -- by leaving dozens of shaft-shaped sex toys on the shelves in response.

Nelson Webb Lentz said he had "a bad experience" at Books-a-Million in Monroe, which prompted him to go to his home and dip into his collection to decorate the shop's religion section with the unholy bookmarks. According to the police report, the 71-year-old confessed after being confronted with surveillance videos, saying that "he had extra items and thought he'd use them for this purpose."

Lentz, who was charged with criminal mischief, did not explain why he chose the religion section for his rampage -- or why he happened to own so many of the marital aids. (The Smoking Gun)